Twenty-six

Friday I celebrated my 26th birthday. I decided to make it a day for myself without any guilt. I went to my Zumba class, worked out a little, went to Walmart to shop my little heart out, and then went to dinner with my family and friends at Red Robin. Overall it was a good day. I just hate the thought of growing older. I feel like my life is already over when I know there is so much more to come! After this thought I decided I needed to make a list of accomplishments I have done in my life and things I still want to do.

Accomplishments
1. Learned to walk, talk, and read.
2. Graduated high school in the top 30 of my class. *I was number 29!* Woot!
3. Went away to college for a year. Yes, it was only a year, but I still made that leap and tried it.
4. Got my first job as a swim coach! And had many more successful jobs after that!
5. Moved in with my fiance and starting learning how to pay bills and manage a household.
6. Graduated college with my BA in Liberal Studies! Then got my credential!
7. Planned a beautiful wedding to my husband and tied the knot on July 19, 2008!
8. Started my careeer as a substitute teacher and managed to get on some priority call lists!
9. Conceived two children who went to Heaven.
10. Made many wonderful friends.
11. Continued to be myself. Kind, helpful, and loving.




To Do
1. Have children.
2. Get a teaching job.
3. Buy a house.
4. Buy a bigger car.
5. Get into shape and drop at least 50 pounds!
6. Finally get organized!
7. Raise my kids.
8. Go on many more vacations including Walt Disney World!
9. Become a grandma (much further down the line!)
10. Eventually retire and finish out the rest of my life with my love.

I guess I still have a lot more to live for! =)

Summer time

Besides the hard times I've been having, I have had some fun this summer.

First of all, Jonathan has started to play hockey. He LOVES it and its great that he has a hobby that he likes so much!





I went to the beach to see my friend two times, within a three day period. This first time I went with my husband for the day and the second time I went with my friend, Brynna, and her kids for the day. I really can't wait to go to the beach again and it needs to be ASAP.
Trip with Jonathan:




Me and the kiddos



Looking for shells



So peaceful!



Mr. River. So cute.






Jill and me



The love of my life.



Shell collection





Trip with Brynna:

Avila Barn. Chickens everywhere!



Feeding the animals



Brynna the photographer =)






Eva's first trip to the beach! So precious!



My friends and their babies




I hope for many more adventures this summer.

Life is just hard sometimes

Sorry I've been MIA, but things have been really hard lately.
Normally I wouldn't post such a personal blog because blogs should really be happy and positive, but I need to get this out in order to heal.

The past 3 months have been very tough for me. May 11 I had a miscarriage. I was only 5 weeks but I was still devastated. We have been trying for over a year and it was my first pregnancy. I began the healing process knowing that it was best for the baby since it probably was not developing correctly. The body is amazing in that way. It knew the baby either wouldn't survive or would have a very hard life.

Four weeks went by and we found out that I was pregnant again! We were so excited and cautious at the same time. We had already been hurt and didn't want to go through it again. We had our first ultrasound and we saw the tiniest little baby. Too tiny to really see anything and my doctor told me I was about 5 weeks and to come back in 2 weeks for another ultrasound. So we scheduled another one on July 19 (our two year anniversary) because Jonathan already had it off. We went to the appointment only to discover that our baby was no longer there. It crushed me. The doctor told me I needed to have a D&C since it didn't look like the body was going to end the pregnancy naturally, so I had it yesterday.

I've been going through a lot of emotions and I'm completely devastated. I know that I meant to be a mother and that it will eventually happen for me, I just wanted this so badly. Most of my friends are either having babies or have already had babies. When will it be my turn to have a little one of my own?

Someday.

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day Mom.
Thank you for everything you have ever done for me.
I love you!

Girls weekend!

My awesome Mom has been so wonderful with taking my sister and I to all of these plays. This past weekend was the last one we are doing this year so she wanted to make it a weekend trip. She had purchased my cousin, Kaitlyn, a ticket as a Christmas gift so we all went together! We had a yummy Italian lunch, saw the play Chicago (it was awesome), went to Universal City walk, stayed at the Hilton, and went to Universal Studios! It was an awesome weekend and I'm so glad we got to do it. Thanks Mom!







We were posing like the sign haha



Kait's first ride on the subway!






The Scooby Van!



Posing with Apollo 13 stars (cutouts haha) and Prof. Clump!






Marge Simpson wig



On the "Tour"



Grandview from Ghost Whisperer! Very cool! hehe



The Killer from Psycho!



He spotted us! Go driver go! haha

Angels in the Outfield

On April 10th Jonathan and I had a date day! He took me to lunch at Long Beach, then shopping at The Block, and then to the Angels game! My first baseball game! Well, the first one I can remember. My parents took me when I was three or four but I have no memories of that haha. We wore our Angels gear and had a GREAT time! I loved every minute of it.












Gotta have the Angels Dog!



This was taken looking through binoculars. Cool right?



They won!

I have no balance

Which is exactly why when I went ice skating I was terrified!
See.





My husband has decided that he wants to get into hockey, so he we decided to start practicing our ice skating. I took one step on the ice and had a panic attack, but eventually I got the courage to go around once. Then I fell and grabbed onto the nearest person, who happened to be a complete stranger. I don't think his girlfriend was pleased haha. At least Jonathan and Alex had a good time.







My mom has been so great. She has been taking us so many places and making my life much more interesting!

Recently she took us to see America's Got Talent! We just saw the auditions (which won't air until June!) but it was still awesome. There were some really great talents and some not so great talents.









With our favorite act, Future Funk. Once you see them you will love them too!




She also took my sister and I to the El Capitan Theater to see Alice in Wonderland. We got the VIP experience and got to see props and costumes from the movie. Afterwards, we went to go see CATS. I was very disappointed in the play and it was by far my least favorite play I had ever seen.














So many great things are coming up and I am so exited! Chicago (the play), Relay for Life, my two year wedding anniversary, and a recently booked trip to Forks, Washington!


Life is good. =)